"Hear you go!" "Hey, over they're!"

Honestly, I'm not a grammar fiend. I'm not the one who will here (see what I did there?) another person say "I'm good!" in response to "How are you doing?" and correct them by saying "Well. You're well."

No. I'm not that person.

I'm the person who writes a completely unprofessional publication of my own creation, who fully intends for it to reflect my tone and likeness as much as possible. I often respond to inquires after my well being with "I'm good, thank you!". That's fine. I'm not publishing in a paper, or putting out a blog intending to reach the masses with current events or human interest pieces.

Today I read an article about a barista creating latte art for his customers. Pretty awesome art, and if you look at my Facebook page you'll see the link to the article. You'll also see me pointing out the misuse of the word 'hear'. Either they misspelt 'here' or misused 'hear', but whatever the reason, the wrong word was in place for that particular context. Now, if that was my blog- my simple, modest blog- I'd just shrug and dismiss it. But no...it's an ABC news blog. ABC. An actual news station that reports news to thousands of people.

That being said- I know it's not a big deal, in the grand scheme of things. Really. I mean, people are dying in the world and I'm complaining about the minor issue of spelling and grammar in the news? Well, I realize we live in the world of 'lol' and 'omg', 'hear' a 'here', 'there' a 'they're, everywhere a 'where' 'wear', but if I'm reading a professional publication I expect to see the correct usage and spelling for things.

The example being set here is unintentional, I'm sure, but when a news service (and abc isn't the only one) isn't even proofreading their own pieces, how can we expect people to know what the difference is between words that sound so similar?

Live Free Or Die!

Yes, for those of you reading...that is the motto of the state of New Hampshire. However, this post has nothing to do with the state of New Hampshire, but rather the word 'free', and how it brings out behaviors in people that mirror that of rabid dogs or hyenas faced with the promise of prey (I realize I'm stereotyping hyenas, but my vision in this case is more like the drooling, cartoonish hyenas in The Lion King).

'Free House Coffee until noon at Starbucks'. I'm seeing that everywhere today, from dealspl.us to yahoo.com. The word free churns up, I imagine, that same feeling that gambling does. A rush of some chemical something-or-other that makes the individual clamor for more. Hence questions like 'does it only have to be a small?', or 'can I just get it later?', or 'can I have more than one?'

Don't get me wrong. I love free things. I like the prospect of getting a free coffee, I like the prospect of getting a free bottle of nail polish. I will get one coffee. I will get one nail polish. I will not get up at 6am to get them, and I will not stand in line for hours on end. Because paying for things is how we support our economy, and because I've seen how obnoxious people can get when things are free.

I realize this sounds awfully judgmental. If you're one of those people who likes free things, go for it. I'm sure you're very polite and understanding, and I'm sure that's appreciated by the people who give you that free coffee or that free sandwich, or that free wi-fi. Continue to be grateful for the free things, and I'm sure you'll be the bright spot in the day of that person who gave you the free haircut.

I still find it entertaining to see the glow in people's eyes when they ask 'Is it true that you're giving away free axes today?'. Doesn't matter if its the most useless thing to them (I mean, how many people need a free nose hair trimmer? Does everyone trim their nose hair? Is it a huge problem?), or if they already have three potato peelers. If it's free...

For some people, landing the free thing is imperative. Vital to their survival, even. And I suppose that's ok...but there's a point where one should stop and say 'if it's while supplies last...maybe someone else needs it more'.

Or maybe they have fifteen. Whatever. At least you've avoided an overstuffed utensil drawer. There's always that small triumph.

$1,000,000,000 Reward for Tips of the Brutal Killing of Miss Manners

     When I think of Miss Manners, I imagine a desiccated corpse sitting in an arm chair all prim and proper. The cobwebs spun over months of isolation reach from the carved wooden arm of the chair to the tip of her nose and the faded floral print of her dress, while her jaw remains frozen in an open mouthed grimace of dismay at the state of the world as it is.

     Why? Why the hell are manners completely extinct? Case in point: I witnessed the following exchange at a coffee shop, and the simple inflection and choice of phrasing was enough to give me a double take.

     Barista hands customer a drink with a visible inch of room at the top.

     B: "Here you go! Have a great day."
     C: "This isn't filled all the way."

     Okay. So they didn't fill it all the way. Some people feel they're being shortchanged. That's too bad- it happens. But really- just ask the barista to fill it.

     Example: B: "Oh, could you just fill that a little bit more?"
                      C: "Sure! No problem!"

   See? Not so hard, really.

    I had a discussion with a friend not too long ago, in regards to the evolution (or de-evolution) or manners, and we've come to the conclusion that they really did skip a generation. My theory is that people who were considered 'the elderly' thirty years ago (when I was a child) are now the ones who are considered the 'elderly', which may very well account for their lack of manners. Because, quite honestly, I haven't met an elderly person in my countless years of retail who has been at all polite when I have been polite TO THEM. I mean, I get being a complete jerk to some upstart brat who talks to you like you're an idiot, but I don't get how you can respond to a smile and a 'have a nice day' with anything other than a 'You too'.

    People my age seem to still have manners- to a degree. The argument can be made that there are still quite a few bad apples who can't display a decent grasp on the concept of manners, but still, there are a fair amount of us who are nice and decent and don't treat those who came before us like they're unworthy of respect. That same argument can be made for any generation, I'm sure- because not everyone can be awesome.

     But.

     Honestly. If manners could just come back. 'Please', 'thank you', and 'may I', seem to have gone the way of the dinosaur, and if meteors were the explanation I'd be able to accept it. I'd like to believe that a flaming bit of rock took out all brain cells in select people that controlled the ability to be polite, but until scientifically proven wrong I shall have to hold on to that theory.

     So my plea to the world is this: Be nice. Say nice things. If someone doesn't make your drink right, or gives you an inch of space in the top of your iced coffee...don't assume they're a jerk. Assume that maybe they think you want space for cream, since you didn't specify. Ask them to fill it, because I imagine it's no more of an imposition to ask that than it is to WAIT for the drink to be filled all the way, as you're going to wait either way.

   Say Please. Thank someone. Ask 'May I borrow your stapler?'. Practice one nice thing every day, and I'm sure the response will eventually be a positive one, even if at first you get those crooked looks of confusion from those unfamiliar with...any of those words.

   Please.

   Thank you.
    

Pick a brand, any brand...

So...friends don't let friends drink Starbucks, hm? In recent years Dunkin Donuts has launched what they and thousands of Americans seem to find a rather amusing marketing ploy against Starbucks Coffee. Ridiculous t-shirts that claim 'friends don't let friends drink Starbucks'. T-Shirts, commercials (I'd imagine, though I haven't seen any commercials of any sort in quite some time) and so on.

 I don't know about you, but while that may seem entertaining to people who see Starbucks as a hoity-toity coffee joint, I see it as an incredibly lame attempt to steer people toward a product that, if it was good enough, could stand on its own without bashing the competition. This marketing angle seems to be nothing more than the Dunkin insecurities rearing their ugly heads and lashing out at whomever they see as a threat to their brand.

Whatever. So Dunkin Donuts may or may not feel threatened by what is likely their biggest competitor coffee wise, although I haven't researched any statistics to prove this, so I can't say that it's a certainty. Maybe McDonalds and their McCafe drinks are the biggest threat. Maybe Seattle's Best (which is, amusingly enough, owned by Starbucks). The bottom line is that taking the road Dunkin has taken doesn't particularly show great sportsmanship on their part. I feel that, once upon a time, I was told that the tactic of attacking another company in any way, shape or form was more or less unprofessional. I mean, if I wanted to say that I thought I could make an incredible Easter ham, and that my friend Bob made a really awful Easter ham...well. You'd think I was a bit of a twit, wouldn't you? Who's to say that Bob's ham is worse than mine? Am I really an authority on that? If I was trying to get more people to come to my house for Easter dinner and started saying how my food was SO much better...wouldn't that give the impression that I was insecure in my ability to cook?

Maybe. Maybe not. But today, as I was sitting in a beautiful downtown cafe that wasn't at all part of a giant chain, I thought about this as I discussed Dunkin Donuts marketing with a friend of mine. I do love drinking coffee- all sorts of coffee- and I can't say that I love everything Dunkin has. I can't say that I love everything Starbucks has. But I can say that as a consumer I think that Dunkin Donuts was taking a rather ridiculous route to prove their point. Don't just sit there and put out shirts that imply letting your friends drink something else is wrong. Stand behind your product. Prove your point with quality, customer service, and price. Make your stand in a way that not only shows you're correct, but continue to do so.

And before you can say anything, I realize that this sort of thing does happen everywhere. You look at a generic cereal box and you'll see words like 'compare to Rice Krispies' in small print on the corner. It's the reality of the world. But you don't look at that same generic cereal box and see 'friends don't let friends eat Rice Krispies', right?

There you go. So drink Starbucks if you want. Drink Dunkin if you want. Let your friends drink whatever they want, and respect them regardless of their choice. Because friends don't let friends drink antifreeze, but friends let friends drink whatever consumable product they want.

Really. Don't let your friends drink antifreeze.

"Isn't it fun, isn't it? Nowadays..."

"You can like the life you're living,

you can live the life you like.

You can even marry Harry,

or mess around with Ike..."

Oh, relationships. So awful, so wonderful, such very excellent fodder from which a person can write a song that may or may not reach the top of the Country Billboard charts. Who can blame a person, though, for writing about heartache and/or anger when it's bankable and will be likely to help you build a lovely little nest egg. I'd write about it myself, if even thinking about any of my past relationships didn't put me into a homicidal rage that causes me to not only lose all creativity but to think of all the things I'd like to do to the person who so unceremoniously ripped me to shreds.

See what I did there? If I were able to retain an objective thought, I'd have taken that very emotion and turned it into a wonderful, head-banging song about men in nice clothing who are really cowards and jerks. 

Anyway. When I was a child, I remember friends mocking the country music genre because they claimed that the artists were only ever singing about losing a truck, a dog, or a wife. Maybe they were, back when I was younger, but now they also sing about shoes ("Red High Heels", by Kellie Pickler), or solo cups ("Red Solo Cup", by Toby Keith), or being young ("22", by Taylor Swift). Maybe they do still sing about getting married on the fly ("Last Name", by Carrie Underwood), but they also sing about hope ("Something Worth Leaving Behind", by Lee Ann Womack) and family ("Home To Me", by   Sarah Darling). The very thing I like about country is probably what a lot of people like about their favored genre- that it speaks to them in some way or another and they can find a connection that they need. 

I'm not going to say how silly I think it is that there's a song on the charts right now called "Thrift Shop" (It's not country...but I don't even really know what it's under), because once upon a time some artist in the country world wrote "She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy" (Really...ugh), and I definitely won't say how stupid I think it is that there's a song that essentially has 'ass' as seventy-five percent of the lyrics, because there's a country song called "Kiss This" (I also think that's incredibly...ugh.). 

Oh, wait. You noticed that I said I wasn't going to say how stupid I thought it was...yet I still did? Caught that, did you? Well. Ha. I'm sure there are plenty of people who think that my taste in music is absolutely dreadful, because I like Taylor Swift. She writes about what she knows, whether anyone dares to think she has no idea what love is...or if they think she's too vindictive by saying what she does. If I had the resources, I'm sure I'd sing from the rooftops about the jerk who broke my heart and couldn't face me himself...especially if I could make money. It'd be like fighting back.

And with the amount of things I'd really like to say to some people, well...I'll take whatever form I can get.

A Single Fangirl in a Fandom World.

Who here is familiar with the term 'fandom'? Good- raise your hands in the Vulcan salute. Now put them down, because I can't see you anyway, so it's no big deal. You may not have even put them up. I don't mind- you don't have to do that for me.

Anyway- a fandom is a group of people who are absolutely head-over-heels in love with a specific show/book series or something like. The Harry Potter fandom is one example, with Potterheads flying flags in all Hogwarts House colors. And the Gleeks, Glee fans who dance in their living rooms and croon the songs sung every week by...whatever that school is (can you tell I'm not really a Glee person?).

Fandoms are everywhere. They're big, they're small (the fandoms of more obscure shows, for example. I can't think of any, but if you go to fanfiction.net you'll see listings for shows with only a few stories written.), but they're always ful if people who are absolutely passionate for their favored show/book.

And the fanfiction. Oh, the glorious fanfiction that comes from the people who belong to these fandoms. Not familiar with fanfiction? That's ok- by the time you're done reading this, you will be. You'll know of several stories, several very good authors, and will wonder how on earth you ever survived without reading stories about Tony Stark's accidental engagement to Pepper Potts.

Ok. Maybe you won't wonder how you ever went without that. But this may lead you down a path that will provide many, many hours of entertainment.

My fandom participation began long ago with Star Trek: Voyager, a show that I've been a fan of ever since the premiere over ten years ago. Such a fan was I that my best friends parents got me a picture of Kate Mulgrew's trailer as a gift (Captain Janeway). And I framed it. I also wrote fanfiction.

You're probably (okay, I know you are) rolling your eyes at this. Fanfiction? Silly, right? Wrong. So wrong. Did you know that Fifty-Shades-Of-This-Is-Just-Awful was a fanfiction? Did you know Mercedes Lackey used to write fanfiction? Well, she did- and now she's famous. Fanfiction has been around forever, and it honestly is one of the best ways I've found to kill time between seasons, or to find new ways to look at characters you enjoy watching.

There's a great website (which I already mentioned), fanfiction.net. There you shall find a crazy assortment of fanfiction ranging from absolutely tame to burning corneas mature. The downside to fanfiction is that anyone can write it, so you'll come across quite a few that are just awful- grammar, spelling, you make it. There will be many that fall under PWP (Plot, what plot?), and countless pieces that are under 1,000 words. One of my favorite fanfics is well over 50,000 words. The range is insane, but fanfiction.net has a great filter system that allows anything for pairings (think you're the only one who imagined Fargo and Dr Blake hooking up on "Eureka"? You're probably not.) to ratings.

The fandom world may appear obsessive to many, but I can tell you this- it can be the most accepting community you'll ever hope to meet. The people I spoke with, beta'd for (to beta is to edit and/or read a fic for someone.) and wrote with were the people who didn't judge me for doing what I did, and the people who challenged me to write scenarios I'd have never thought up on my own.

Fandoms are everywhere, and they're just going to keep getting bigger. So allons-y, my fellow Whovians, and Live Long and Prosper, Trekkies. Because while life can take a lot from us, it can never take the sky from me.

"It's love, in point of fact."

I feel that my topic was best expressed by the bounty hunter in the movie "Serenity", who described the emotion in Simon Tam's face upon rescuing his sister as the subject line above.

"It's love, in point of fact."

Having just watched one of my favorite romantic comedies, "Laws of Attraction", I feel like posting a little bit about my view of romantic comedies, love, and the way a person can fall into it so fast it may seem a bit unrealistic. I'm one of those people, unfortunately, although I sometimes wonder if it isn't due to some deep psychological issue that I have yet to uncover without years of in depth therapy. Alas, I don't have hundreds of dollars to fork over so that some ivy league shrink can delve into my deepest insecurities like some sort of Freudian Indiana Jones...so that leaves me to strike out on my own and hope for the best.

What is love? ("Baby, don't hurt me...don't hurt me...no more..." Come on. I know you were thinking it.). Well, someone might say love is an emotion, while another may say it's a chemical reaction, blah-de-blah-blah. I know it's caring, and compassion, and the desire to take into consideration the well being of someone other than yourself. I know that it's an emotion and not just a physical need to be with someone. I know that it can come and go, it can hit you like a ton of bricks, and it can throw you off guard like nothing you've ever experienced. Every. Single. Time. It can be different and exactly the same, but it's wonderful. Everybody should have it. Everybody deserves it.

What brings this on is the occasional thought that maybe I'll never have it again. That each time I experience it could be the last time. Because there may be no more chances that I'll look at someone and my heart will leap, or that I'll feel an instant attraction akin to an adrenaline high. Maybe that last time was it, and two times was the unfortunate charm, rather than three.

I know, I know- this is sad. And some will say untrue. But the truth of the matter is that no one can really say whether or not there's someone for everyone, or whether or not one person can keep finding love. I'm not giving up, not at all, but desperately trying to hold on to the thought that I may not find someone to be with for the rest of my life. Just because I may not doesn't mean I won't be happy...and it doesn't mean I'm sabotaging my future by going into it with even a glimmer of this in the back of my mind.

It just means I'm choosing to look at it from a point of view that isn't inside the lines. Anyone who knows me can say I'm not an 'inside the lines' kind of girl, so understand when I say that this opinion will probably never change. I'm not saying I won't fall in love again...I'm just saying that there may not be any one person.

And that, my friends, is okay. Even if people don't always believe it.

"So the final question is...why do people want to fall in love?"
"Because when it does last...it feels fucking great."
-Barbra Streisand as Rose Morgan, "The Mirror Has Two Faces".